Marbles / Kancha - Come2Play

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Hello Everyone!

Wishing you a very prosperous and Happy NeW Year 2011 TO You....

 Welcome to your personal connect with SaGaR Love Guru. This is the place where you not only get to know a little more about me, but you can also share your personal experiences in relationships and interesting instances of your life. The best ones would make it to the show...

Thank You So much

UNDERSTANDING YOUR GIRLFRIEND

Women are complex creatures, sometimes frustratingly so. There are times when we make the men in our lives want to throw up their hands in defeat and say, "I'll just never understand what women want!" 

Don't give up hope. Sometimes the key to understanding your girl is to read between the lines of what she's saying to discover what she really means. 

It's not entirely our fault that we have this round about way of communicating. Boys are taught from a young age that asking for what they want is the best way to get it, while girls are encouraged to use our "feminine wiles" to maneuver our way into what our heart desires. 

It doesn't help that a straightforward persistent woman in our society is often tagged with unfair labels like "bitch" or "ball breaker". So instead of being direct, we sometimes take the long way to getting to what we really mean. To help you understand, there are certain things you can look for to help you decode the meaning behind your girlfriend's words. 

She Wants To Be Babied 
"I had a really busy day" = "I need some pampering" 
When your girl complains about her long hard day, there's a good chance it's not just to get it off her chest. She wants you help her relax, but instead of just asking you for a back massage, or to run her a hot bath, she feigns helplessness so you'll be able to sweep in as her man and fix everything for her. 

It's hard for a modern feminist woman to ask for help from her man. We all want to believe we can take care of ourselves, but there are times when we just want to be coddled a little bit. So, instead of being annoyed by her whining, do the smart thing and ask her what she needs to unwind. Trust me, you'll reap the rewards later. 
It's Time to Talk
"I don't feel like talking" = "I really NEED to talk" 
You can tell something is bothering your girl, but when you ask she says nothing is wrong. Don't be fooled, she really does need to talk. She just wants you to press her a little. If you insist on asking what's wrong it convinces her that you really want to hear about her problems and help resolve them. 

Try to encourage her to open up without nagging. Instead, let her know that you are concerned and open to listening. She really does want to tell you about the fight she had with her best friend or how much getting passed over for that promotion at work upset her, but unless you show genuine interest, she'll probably keep it bottled up. 

The only time this translation may not be accurate is when she's upset about something you did. In this case, she may really need some space and time to think before she confronts you with it. 
She's Feeling Insecure 
"I'm not jealous" = "I need reassurance" 

You've just run into your ex-girlfriend while walking down the street with your current one. You can tell that the unexpected meeting has your girl frazzled, but she insists she's not threatened. 

What NOT to do in this situation is accuse her of being mistrustful or joke about how cute she is when she's jealous. The right thing to do here is to reassure her of your love and devotion without being too obvious about it. Try something like, "Wow, seeing Suzy again just makes me realize how perfect you and I are together." 
She Wants to Get Serious "So are we like together?" = "I want a commitment" 

Stereotypically, guys are all commitment phoebes while their girls are fervently awaiting him dropping to one knee in the perfect moment of romantic dedication. This may not be universally true, but there's a good chance she's looking toward the next stage in your relationship before you've even entertained the concept. 

Not wanting to come on too fast or too strong, she'll probably be fairly hesitant to come right out and say she'd like to be your girlfriend or that she thinks that it's time you moved in together. Make it easy on her by being honest and clear about your feelings and intentions. If you're not quite ready to pledge monogamy, say so, but tell her that you think it's a big step, something you don't want to take lightly. 

Ask for some time to think about it. Never make a commitment that you're not willing to follow through on. If you're not done playing the field, don't give the impression that you are. It will only lead to heartbreak.

WAYS TO INCREASE YOUR LOVE

For most couples, whether married or in a long-term relationship, it can be a difficult transition once the "honeymoon" stage is over. The initial lust and butterflies in the stomach you once felt may have given way to a more laid-back, comfortable feeling with your significant other. It is normal for long-standing relationships to cool down after a while and this is when the real relationship building begins.

A good partnership is like tending to a pet - either you feed and nurture it, or bad things will happen. The small things you do become important. Daily habits help to forge strong relationships and marriages. It can be as simple as remembering to tell your partner "I love you," everyday.

If you are really serious about making your relationship work, there are several little rituals that you can incorporate into your daily life.

Talk To Each Other
Most relationship experts would agree that talking is the most important elements of a healthy partnership. Happy couples typically say their relationship works better when they can sit down one-on-one, share their feelings and work out their frustrations. Topics of discussion can extend past your relationship. Talk about work, how your day is going, or something funny that happened to you.

Many couples may complain that it is hard to find time in their busy day to have a daily couple's pow-wow. Well, it doesn't have to be an hour-long psych session each day. You simply have to set aside a few minutes for your special someone. For example, do a "weather" check during the day. Call your partner at home or at work to see how his/her day is going. By doing this, you will be more in sync when you reconnect after work.

If you have a pet dog, how about walking it together every night? The quiet time and fresh air can be your chance to focus on each other. If you have missed each other during the day, be sure to catch up at night right before going to bed. It is in this relaxed atmosphere that you can unwind and tell your partner about your busy day.

When you live together, you may automatically think you know everything about your lover. In reality though, it is very easy for life to get in the way if you don't take the time to connect with each other.
Flirt

Flirting isn't just for teenagers and couples on their first date. Part of a healthy sexual relationship involves flirting with each other everyday. And it doesn't just have to be a form of foreplay. Even on the nights when you are just too doggone tired to be intimate in bed, flirting can be a fun way to keep the zest in your relationship.

Don't be embarrassed about flirting in public either. Show off the strength of your relationship with a little PDA (public displays of affection). Walk hand in hand and try to steal a quick hug or kiss whenever you can. Most importantly, don't forget to say "I love you," as much as possible throughout the day.
Be Silly Together

Life is serious enough. Sometimes you just need to do something really silly. And if you can't do it with your significant other, who can you be silly with? When you find the time, try reliving your childhood by visiting an amusement park. Go on all the scary rides and eat all the sweets you can until your stomach can take no more.

For a daily ritual that you and your partner can share at home, try playing a game of Twister. The contorted positions you will find yourselves in will have you laughing in no time. Or kick back and watch a funny TV show that both of you enjoy. Whatever you do, the important thing is to laugh and have fun together.
Declare Your Independence

Remember that healthy relationships are made up of two independent people who have their own personalities and interests. It's not good for the relationship to be constantly joined at the hip. So also make a daily habit of getting away from each other. Peruse your own hobbies and interests.

Doing things separately gives you a chance to fill in the blanks that your partner may not be able to fill for you. For example, if one of you likes sports and the other likes the arts, use your alone time to go to the gym or enroll in a painting class. At the end of your day, you will find that you have more to talk about. It will help bring freshness to the relationship, as you both continue to grow as people.
Cultivate Common Interests
Along with developing your personal interests, apart from one another, it is also essential to find something you can do together. The emphasis is on finding an activity you can both enjoy. Although your definition of fun may be going shopping, he may not enjoy being dragged along.

If common interests are not present, happy couples develop them. Try working out at the gym together. Or take some classes together until you find something you both like. Maybe you'll both fall in love with cooking and connect each night by preparing dinner together.

TRUE LOVE OR FAKE LOVE

HOW TO KNOW IF IT IS REAL

Finding out if what you have is true love can be tricky. Feelings must be analyzed before they can be identified for what they truly are. The best way to find out how you really feel about someone is to sit down and dissect the relationship.

Signs Of Not Real Love
Possible signs that it isn't true love is you...

• think of your partner as absolutely perfect
• are concerned with your needs first
• need to spend all your free time with your partner
• quickly became infatuated with your partner
• tend to be jealous easily
• can't come to a compromise after fighting

Signs Of A True Love

Possible signs that what you have may be true love is you...

• accept your partner and their flaws
• are concerned with your partner's needs first
• are comfortable being apart from one another
• slowly fell for your partner
• trust your partner completely
• are able to resolve a fight and grow stronger through it

THINGS THAT KILL A LOVING RELATIONSHIP

THINGS THAT KILL A LOVING RELATIONSHIP

Not Listening

Communication is the crux of all relationships, and if the communication is not strong then your relationship will not be. Not only is talking about your feelings important, but listening is also vital.

When your mate is unleashing his or her emotions on you, make it evident that you are taking what he or she says into consideration. Do this by showing a sincere interest in things you know are important to him or her, regardless if it is a minor thing or a major thing.
Also, if your significant other notifies you of an aspect of your personality or behavior that he or she dislikes that is within reason, try your hardest to prevent yourself from doing such things in the future. Although you may not completely eliminate that annoying habit, the effort that you show will be enough to satisfy that person.
Excess Baggage
Everyone has baggage; however, the key is dealing with that baggage and not allowing it to influence your relationship. 

Everyone goes through obstacles throughout their day that cause stress. However, by no means should you tell your mate every time you are upset. With that said, do tell the person when something major happens to you-not when you've been plagued with something as minor as a paper cut. Nobody likes to be burdened with other people's downfalls on a constant basis because they are dealing with their own misfortunes as well.
Commitment Problems
With time, a certain comfort level is reached in a relationship. When this happens, a relationship becomes serious, or in other words, committed. For some, the word "committed" entails labels and obligations.
In order to be in a committed relationship, you must be mature and realize that it will take hard work and dedication to maintain. Make sure that your mate knows where he or she stands with you at all times. This is achieved through actions. Show your mate how much he or she means to you by writing a sentimental poem or by literally telling that person.
Commitment is scary for many because it serves as the end to just being you and the beginning for you being two. So if you are in fact serious about your mate, do not force him or her into a commitment; rather, let things ease into that stage. Do this first by taking the relationship day to day, and then as things progress, subtly slip hints that you are beginning to think about your future together.
Family Matters
The family – you have to love them even though most times it would be easier to throw pixie dust on them and wish they would vanish off to Never land. However, the reality is that you must make sure you are on your best behavior in front of them if you want a serious long-lasting relationship with your mate.
Keep in mind that you must think of this task as a job. You can make a great first impression, but the staying power of that impression is what counts. Make sure the family feels that you are not only getting to know them for your mate, but that you are also getting to know them because you actually like them as people. With that said, invite them to join you in activities that do not include your mate such as shopping.
Also, make sure you exercise great mannerisms. This means always cleaning the table after a meal without being asked and always offering to help in chores around the house. Not only must you go that extra mile, but you also must make sure you impress while doing so. This means always bringing a dish of the family's favorite food each time you come over, or calling the person's mom when at the supermarket to see if she needs anything.
Being a Workaholic
In this day and age, the height of success is a long and rough road to travel. In your voyage to riches, you may unintentionally neglect your special someone.
Your mate can only be so supportive. Remember a long-lasting relationship is as fulfilling as a successful career. As a career entails obstacles and levels to reach the top, so do relationships. However, this does not mean to place your relationship over your career, but rather balance the two.
To maintain this juggling act, you should try to invite your mate to work gatherings and keep him or her updated on the events in your career. This way they will feel connected to that aspect of your life and will be more understanding if you sometimes decide to choose work over them.
YOU DON’T NEED THEM
If your mate still ends up breaking up with you even after all of this, do not waste your time being upset; rather, be relieved with the reassurance that you can do much better.